Unless...

The definition of passion - boundless enthusiasm (from free online dictionary)

Professor Larry Smith of the Economics Department at the University of Waterloo has something to say about loving what you do. I've pasted in below his entertaining and poignant rant about why you will fail to have a good career because you have to pursue 'the greatest fascination in your life' not just something interesting that will pay the bills. You will fail to have a great career UNLESS you do what you are passionate about.

http://www.ted.com/talks/larry_smith_why_you_will_fail_to_have_a_great_career.html

I saw Dr. Seuss' movie The Lorax last weekend with my ten and twelve year old sons. The Lorax is the keeper of the trees and yet fails to protect them. The resurrection of the trees falls to a boy who wants to impress a girl by giving her what she really wants, which is a real tree in an artificial town. I won't give away the ending of the movie as you should go see it, but suffice it to say that the Lorax leaves the pivotal character with the word UNLESS imprinted on one of the rocks that used to encircle a tree. Dr. Seuss said "unless someone like you cares an awful lot, nothing is going to get better. It's not." He had passion and made a difference in children's lives while entertaining us adults at the same time.

I feel the same way. Nothing is going to get better, unless....In my mundane little world these days here is my unless. I'm struggling with my playwriting course. I want to write a play I really do, but my playwriting teacher keeps telling me to write what I would if I had six months left to live. If that's not a deadline to inspire passion I don't know what is!

But, I only signed up because I wanted to learn the nuts and bolts of playwriting. My instructor wants me to fire up my creative soul. I don't have a subject I'm that passionate about to cram into a 45 minute comedy. What I lack is inspiration and the boundless enthusiasm to hammer out 45 pages. So, I'll finish out this course and look for my passion again in the stories I seem, so far, to be only able to tell in short story and novel form. I won't think any further on the whole 'doing what you love' conundrum. For now I have a good career and a great passion for writing on the side. So I will keep on keeping on unless....

International Women's Day - let's party

On International Women's Day I've decided to enjoy being a chick. Not that I don't every other day of the week, but sometimes when I'm knee deep in dishes or groceries or other unpaid forms of labour I do wonder if it shouldn't be called something else like International Schmuck's Day.

 

But then I look at my kids and think that I was lucky enough to have them. I wake up next to my husband and think he's pretty cute and he likes women so I'm a shoo in. Then I come to work in a still male-dominated industry and I enjoy my job and make ok money, but there have been times when being a woman was definitely a liability. It's amazing how many old school chauvinists are still alive and well in Canada. Plus, if I turn the TV on the amount of T&A reinforces my suspicion that society may just view me as a piece of meat until I'm of a 'certain age' and then I'm invisible.

 

That said I am thankful to be a woman in Canada and not in a country where being a second class citizen is ingrained in the law and social mores of the society. I do own property, and I do make my own living plus I'm allowed to vote. Yay for me! Let's work together to roll those basic human rights out to the rest of the world. I believe that socieities where women are cherished and their voices heard have both the head and heart to drive economic and social growth without leaving anyone behind.

 

Anyway, I hope you all have a good day and think about the fact that there is not International Men's Day likely because they don't need one. I do like men, but I don't want to be one ;)

 

http://www.calgaryherald.com/life/Women+still+getting+left+behind+study+says/6256006/story.html

Introverts Unite!

http://www.forbes.com/sites/jennagoudreau/2012/01/30/quiet-revolution-of-the-50-percent-introverts-susan-cain/

 

It took me a long time to accept that I am a social introvert. I like people, just not lots of them all at once in my face. I prefer small dinners with friends to clubbing with strangers. I am a homebody not a galavanter.

 

Maybe I write because I prefer that to speaking. It's not that I have nothing to verbally say, but  what I say is well-considered and shared sparingly. I wish others would do the same, but such is not our culture these days. Today more is better, quantity is quality and there are few social filters so we hear just about every thought expressed 24/7 whether we care or not. Thank you Facebook.

 

I'm happy there is a 'Quiet Revolution' under way. I hope we can find a balance between the 'cult of personality' and a deeper more reflective state of being that might consider leaving a bit unsaid, a few seconds of silence perhaps to encourage sharing of emotions and ideas, which I believe they call communication. My husband calls it being on receive rather than transmit. We should all try that sometimes. You'd be amazed what you hear when you stop talking and just breathe.

 

My son had an extroverted teacher in his earlier grades. She was a good teacher, but she thought his lack of sharing in class (for which he was docked marks because it's all about participation and group work these days) meant he was approaching deaf-mutism. After I stopped my inner screaming, I told her that he only speaks when he has something to say and someone he feels comfortable sharing it with. He is with a teacher now who lets him speak and actually listens.

 

Introverts don't like being bombarded with stimulus. We will share if you give us room and time to speak. That's why I enjoy writing. I can have a conversation with my readers and myself without anyone interrupting. It allows for quiet reflection and communication.

 

Thanks for listening.

to boldly go where I should - any ideas on the art of brashness?

I love the protagonist's obsession with the classic tale Treasure Island in Sara Levine's novel of the same name (only followed by lots of exclamation points). Sara's main character seeks to emulate the life of adventure found in the classic novel by concentrating on the qualities she feels she lacks:   BOLDNESS, RESOLUTION, INDEPENDENCE AND HORN-BLOWING.

Living in Calgary I have the horn-blowing down pat as I jockey for position with other aggressive drivers in the 24-7 rush hour. But, I think she meant horn-blowing of a different nature. I like to think I'm learning how to toot my own horn, but I think I need to embrace brashness like Sara Levine's protagonist without getting fired. How can I flex my self-awareness and self-actualization muscles without offending those around me who like my diplomatic ways? Maybe I need to say what I mean and mean what I say and let the consequences rain down. So, if I don't say anything to you it's because I don't have anything nice to say. Don't go away mad, just go away.

BOLDNESS. Hmmmm, let's see....Last year I bought red lipstick, got boudoir pics done and took up boxing, plus started a writing group. Check.

RESOLUTION. At the start of every new year I resolve to spend less and save more, to eat less and exercise more. I seem to stay the same in these areas, but at least I'm not sliding into the abyss of greed and sloth! I always resolve to write more and to get published. Last year I managed to work on more projects than ever and send more out plus got another story published.

INDEPENDENCE. Really, at this stage in life I doubt my father would take me back. So, yay, mission accomplished.

So I seem to be doing ok by Sara Levine's standards, but I aspire to the brashness of her anti-heroine. I need to be selfish and oblivious to the feelings and needs of others. I need to do more horn blowing and less listening. Perhaps I  need to buy a white peasant blouse and a flowing velvet skirt plus a large black hat with a colourful plume and randomly shout 'shiver me timbers'.

I need more adventure in my life, more anarchy. Although living with 5 boys, an entrepreneurial husband and a dog, I often feel that I am surrounded by pirates, just not plank walking, gun firing ones. The only plank I have in my life is the ab exercise I employ to outwit the hands of time that pull on my middle-aged midsection.

Maybe I can engage in small acts of adventure to spruce up my otherwise stable middle class, working Mom existence. Maybe instead of sorting the laundry into darks and whites I will mix the two and give all the boys pink socks. Maybe I'll elbow the brasher little old ladies (who time has allowed to say 'I don't give a crap anymore') out of the way to squeeze the canteloupes first and with more gusto than they can muster. Maybe, just maybe I'll be the heroine in my own life and provide comic relief to those around me.

In the end, I think it boils down to living with exclamation marks; to boldy resolve to be an independent horn-blowing heroine in an adventure of my making. I hope it's one worth starring in and one that others will enjoy watching.

The day the internet went dark...

This one's from the Advocacy Committee I belong to through the Writers Guild of Alberta. I'm all for free speech AND for protecting my work. Seems the States is having the same struggle with copyright that Canada is.

http://advocacywga.wordpress.com/2012/01/18/can-we-have-copyright-in-the-internet-age/

The importance of others and of being selfish.....

That sounds mutually exclusive, but it's not. Think about it....as a mother, popular wisdom tells me that in order to be a good one I need to first take care of myself.

 

Case in point, over the holidays, the kids were off school for 19 days. That's a lot of quality time together with too much sugar and not enough to do. My kids headed to their Dad's for a weekend and my husband and his boys had a pizza, chicken wing, boy-movie Friday night that left our house looking like a garbage heap. I found myself in need of an escape on the Saturday as I couldn't imagine a repeat of me climbing into bed with earplugs and a pillow over my head only to awake the next day to a kitchen that looked like a Febreeze commercial.

 

At first I felt guilty for abandoning my husband, but I thought that was a much better solution than slamming around the house like a bear with a sore paw or hiding out at my all-female gym for the next 24 hours. So, I packed up the dog (love him as he doesn't watch tv, eat pizza or speak), headed for the Wendy's drivethrough for an apple pecan salad and a Diet Coke and then hit the open road. Think Thelma and Louise only my dog is hairier and I'm not a redhead. Alas, there was no Brad Pitt hitchikers either!

 

I drove to our cabin at Gleniffer Lake, 90 minutes north of Calgary. In summer, the resort is packed with families sitting on the deck of the Landing Restaurant, boating on the lake and swimming in the pool. But in winter, with the snow blanketing the golf course and the water in our phase shut off, there are only a handful of the 700 or so lots occupied.

 

I pulled in at 5 pm, just as the sun dipped towards the lake. I turned our outdoor Xmas lights on and let the dog roam free where he marked my neighbours' lawns and the green space as his territory. The Canada Geese have migrated south and the golfers too. There was one other lot in my phase with their Xmas lights on too, but no car in the driveway. I was finally alone!

 

I spent some time writing and some time snuggled on the couch with my dog's head in my lap as I watched reruns of the Big Bang Theory. I went to bed late and in the complete silence of a few acres of farmland on the dammed Red Deer River, I felt truly peaceful. I had left the city and a house full of dishes behind and I had nowhere to go and nothing to do. Of course it did occur to me that the poor saps in horror movies are usually alone in a secluded place when their brains are eaten by zombies, but I was too tired to care.

 

I awoke the next morning enveloped in the absence of sound- no traffic, no kids, no boats zipping about. As I made my breakfast, the whine of a plane wafted across the frozen water.

 

The dog and I headed out for a walk to the dog park at the edge of a ranch. In summer he runs straight for the lake and plunges in looking for sticks. But in winter, the sticks are hidden by snow and the lake is a little harder to wade into with abandon, so he charged at the horses leaning on the fence and I watched as they jumped from side to side not sure if they should be afraid or amused.

 

At noon, I packed up the cabin and headed back to town. It was time to get back to my husband and our family, our messy house and intensive schedule. I'd missed my husband, who is my usual roadtrip buddy, but I know he appreciates it when I take care of myself so that I can then take care of others. The dog doesn't care, he just wants to go back to the lake.

 

2011 - the Year of the Canadian Novel

I've read many of the 'best of' and for most of the rest I'm stuck in a long lineup at the library. Just finished Half-Blood Blues and found it hauntingly beautiful and satisfying.

I agree with all the insights below and was especially surprised to put Marina Endicott's third novel The Little Shadows down after 50 pages and not pick it up again. Good to a Fault was just that - so good!

Here's hoping 2012 is another banner year for Canadian Lit.

http://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/arts/books/by-any-measure-it-was-a-banner-literary-year/article2285317/